Premature Goodbyes

My Rooftop

The bird poop covered tiles shift dangerously under my feet as I feel my way to the top of the roofline. Shoots of color burst in the sky lighting my precarious pathway. My sneakers fit between the long grooves of curved tiles as I slowly lower myself to a sitting position. Behind me the stained glass windows of the church glow with the prayer candles lit during today’s six o’clock mass. A motorcycle speeds up one of the narrow streets and my ears follow its progress from the side of my house to the street beyond and then gone, into the night toward the celebration. Each starburst and shower of stars perfectly coordinates with the symphony of music rising from the park in the distance. I sit in silence, in awe of the display occurring in the night sky.

Two cats crawl from an open window from an apartment nearby and make their way toward the three roommates careening on the rooftop. The one furthest from the cats nearly falls from her perch as she hastily makes her way back to the open kitchen window, away from the meowing shadows. The fireworks stop as we clumsily descend back into our apartment. The metal frame of the window scrapes my hand as I lower myself down into my bedroom. My feet do not touch the floor and in one less than fluid moment I land on my bed, snapping the web of clothesline from my room’s ceiling.

I quickly close my window so the cats do not follow me in as one has done before. The moment is over. My roommates make their way back to their separate rooms as I look up out my window. I can still see the glowing stained glass of the church and the stars high above in the night sky, but the Italian fireworks and orchestra are gone. A shadow crosses my Italian window as I think of the coming goodbyes. My last goodbye will be with the window that has spoken to me in the night to tell me it is raining and has woken me with the gift of sunlight. My window into another world. My room, with pictures of my smiling friends and family members back in California, reminds me of the life I have back in California. On the rooftop there are no reminders of that life. There is only the open sky

My Window